I think that both camps have some of it right. It comes down to nuance and perception.

Forgive me if this goes a bit off-piste for a bit:
About eleventy million years ago, when I first realised that if I offered to carry heavy things then I could get into gigs for free (and they'd even pay me to do it) I started hanging around the sound and foldback desks to try and learn. Try as I might I'd watch the the sound guys adjust things, I knew what they were changing, but for the life of me I couldn't hear what they were changing. As time went on I found I could hear when things weren't right, then later I could hear when they got fixed (or not as the case may be).

Years later I'd go and see mates play and couldn't help but fiddle to fix the mix, I could hear it, why couldn't anyone else?

Even more years later (like now) that ability is fading as I no longer go to many gigs and certainly haven't stood at a desk for a very long time.

The point being I could hear the difference, as I bet many of you can, just like the guitarist, fiddle player, trombonist or drummer reckon they can hear the difference between different finishes, or different polish (?) or different drum sticks.

The thing is 99.999999999999999% of punters can't and even other muso's can't because they're not attuned to the nuances.

To be honest, the real world goes a bit more like "near enough for rock'n'roll" rather than "can you hear that change?".